Wednesday, June 20, 2012

life in perspective

Seriously! what is wrong with me? I am feeling so sorry for myself and my situation right now. and a friend of mine is going through huge medical issues with her baby son... i feel like a horrible person posting this but i HAVE to get it out of my head or i will go crazy

I dont know how much longer I can last here. I am in my craft room working and of course she goes in there MIL starts digging through my hat pattern pieces and takes a piece out then she comments on the die and she is impressed that "they cut the tabs out for me" I point out that I designed it that way, and she was like oh, hmp. then she proceeds for fold up my hat brim I was like ummm what are you doing,and she says, (get this) this is MY fabric! (she bought a yard and gave me half)

do Ii tell her it was the buckram IIIII bought? NO so I tell her yes, and I left you a half a yard JUST like you told me to I left the room as she was saying she was sorry and she will iron out the folds 

and yesterday she has the nerve to tell me she was tired of doing the dishes

Today FIL was saying how he wanted to put a second story on this house with a seperate entrance and she says "for us?" and he said, no for them she glared at me! what did I do? 

 MIL is always saying they have no money and how they dont know how they will buy groceries,  I have bought $300 in groceries in the last 3 weeks and they have eaten $250 of that

I am so sick of hearing her huff and puff and choke on her food, I don't know if that's all an act because she only does it at home, but I suspect it is,  she has fake vomited DURING dinner 3 times and she is all like "drink please" and he hands her a drink and she coughs for the rest of the meal and when she is not making me lose my appetite buy coughing, she is bringing up money or other topics to ruin my dinner she keeps asking me about my income. 

I am trying to be understanding. I know what situation they are in... FIL is eligable to get social security of $1500 a month and he refuses to go apply for it. He needs to go get his birth certificate so he can get his identification so he can get ANYTHING, and he refuses!

I am at my wits end with these people. I went to SELL MY JEWELRY (my anniversary ring) to get some money to pay my cell phone bill and she says "good luck, we have bills to pay." WE?! 

The electricity is due to be cut off day after tomorrow, I dont have the money to pay it AND they have been here for a month now using the electric ALL DAY LONG! and I am supposed to come up with all the money to pay for that 

Jesus please show me what I need to do!


yesterday i talked about hubs idea to build a garage apartment or second story with a separate entrance and we could have our own space and they would have income coming in. We told them that we would rather pay them rent and help them out than some stranger. All they would have to do is go get the home improvement loan and we would help with the construction, the payments for them would be about $500 a month and we would be willing to pay $700 in rent for our own space. well FIL walks out of the room and i told MIL what a toll it is on our marriage. She said she would talk to richard... 

So today when we were walking out the door, i told them they needed to discuss the offer and make a decision today weather or not they were going to do any additions to the property. If they were we would do what they needed us to do to help. If they were not we were going to find a place and move.

They do not pick up after themselves, the living room is littered with their dirty clothes. the have stuff everywhere. it is chaotic and makes me anxious. 


Well they said no, so we are planning on moving.

This is going to be so hard for us as I am taking a substantial pay cut with a new job to go back to school to get my bachelors degree. Hubz is still looking for another job and we have not heard anything about him going back to teach in the fall. 

I am so depressed all i want to do is cry.

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